12 Terrible Christmas Stock Photos

Dec 24, 2011 by jerry    1 Comment     Posted under: Graphic Design

Stock photos are a staple for most graphic designers. They are a quicker and cheaper alternative to setting up a photoshoot. There are some talented stock photographers that recognize this and ensure their photos are useful for design. And then there are those that simply don’t get it.

That’s where this list comes in, and since it’s the holiday season, let’s attach a theme to it! There’s no shortage of terrible Christmas themed stock photography available and this list of 12 is in no way exhaustive. What this list is, however, is a compilation of Christmas stock photography that may lack style, have no photographic merit and have questionable subject matter or themes, but above all, they are terrible beyond any conceivable use. So without further ado…

I can’t think of many cases where a photo of a kid about to puke in front of a Christmas tree would properly convey the spirit of the holidays.

Few things bring tears to my eyes like watching a child hurriedly rushing from bed to open presents and then getting attacked by a psychotic cat leaping out of a stocking on Christmas.

This one has some terrible implications: 1) Santa is just someone’s grandma 2) Santa’s elves are actually just someone else’s grandma 3) Some poor kid is going to get a Russian doll for Christmas.

If anyone can tell me what a kid , hands pressed together in prayer, staring at me with murderous intent while being a puzzle means in the context of Christmas, I’m all ears.

Okay, so I see the hat, but that’s still a terrible impression of Santa. Worst mime ever.

Sexy Christmas pictures aren’t hard to find. What is hard to find are sexy Christmas pictures of girls being robbed!

You know this one kind of works… if we pretend Christmas is about going on murderous rampages or peeping into ladies locker rooms.

Normally scantily clad women wearing hooker boots is a hard sell for Christmas imagery, but sit a scantily clad woman wearing hooker boots in such a way that there is a phallic Christmasy explosion from her crotch and we’re in business.

Whenever the holiday season rolls around one of my favourite things to do is stare and giggle at what my package looks like in a banana hammock too!

This one is so close. It almost nails it. If only the skull and crossbones with the giant freaky eyes wearing the Santa hat while floating over a burning forest had a nice white beard.

Is he wringing his hands or counting imaginary money? Whatever the case, someone is getting a present so that makes this a great Christmas image.

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Happy holidays!

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